PREJUDICE AGAINST "BABY BOOMERS" IS NOT OKAY EITHER

Me in my early 20's

When I was young and knew nothing, I had scores of people clamoring for my opinions, my friendship, and my heart, especially when I was a young, fairly pretty screenwriter, selling my work to a major Hollywood studio. But now, despite years of experience, education, adventures and wisdom, I am fighting a general tendency of others to treat me as if I am a dunce or a mental patient, simply because I have reached a certain age. Being poor, disabled and needy probably has something to do with my sudden status as an imbecile. Too often, I am the recipient of the unwarranted rolled eyeballs. You know what I am talking about.

I am aware that, in the spiritual realm, this treatment is supposed to be good for me, and I try to bow my head to it as much as possible, but it goes against the grain, having been an entirely independent woman from the age of 17, when I walked out of my natal home with nothing but the clothes on my back and South Indian hippie purse that contained little more than a hair brush and some lipstick. It is my life experiences that have taught me to speak out against injustice and prejudice, otherwise the next gal will get an even worse time of it. I owe it to her to put the brakes on, if only just a little bit.

In the wake of the Trump era, I have experienced incidents of discrimination having to do with my disabilities, which is made worse by ageism and fat prejudice. You may remember that grocery clerk at the Smiths store who told me that he believes in "Trump's law" (whatever THAT was) and that, unless I have had "two arms cut off or two legs cut off," I am not really disabled and don't deserve to park in the handicap parking, despite being actually disabled and having a legitimate, state-issued parking placard.

Many people in our culture are making these decisions about the worthiness of others, based only on what a cursory glance tells them.

Last Friday, I had a horrible experience with a passport agent at the post office who was unreasonably nasty, personally offensive, and condescending to me in a way that I never experienced before the addition of wheels to my life; wheels on my walker, wheels on my electric scooter, and wheels on a car I cannot live without because walking has become impossible. I had nightmares for two days afterwards.

Today, I endured the sneers, rolling eyeballs and tsk tsking of fellow shoppers at Whole Foods, as I tried to maneuver down the aisles in the electric cart that is far too big, the dimensions of which were blatantly ignored when the clerks placed their food displays in the narrow corridors. One woman was so keen to circumvent my little parade, she pushed her cart with great force from the checkout line to the far wall. It neatly clipped my shuddering vehicle. She glared at me, as if it was MY bright idea to send a grocery cart careening across the waxed floors, unmanned.

When my groceries were finally rung up, I discovered, to my utter chagrin, that I'd left my debit card in my other purse, something I have never done in my life, and thereby earned a withering glance from the cashier. It was then that I learned that Whole Foods does not take checks and, though owned by Amazon, has no method of getting payment from you if you leave your card at home. It's cash or plastic, and that's it. I seem to remember it being very easy to read someone's check, in day's gone by, but apparently, that is too simple. The cashier was completely devoid of empathy. He said he could put the groceries aside for me to pick them up later or they could put them all away. He and the packing clerk exchanged ugly glances.

One of the reasons that my apartment is not suited to my needs is that I live in a food desert. There is one very small neighborhood market with highly suspect, extremely expensive fruits and vegetables. Expiration dates are very near or actually expired and I suspect that the storage in the back room is not air conditioned properly because the fruits and vegetables wilt within a day of buying them. ALL of the grocery stores that carry healthy foods are MILES away from where I live, and shopping trips are very hard on me. I was a long way from home, with no debit card. I just couldn't come back.

I couldn't see myself driving 20 minutes home to get my card, 20 minutes back to the store, 20 minutes home again. I could not do that extra hour and also put away groceries that would be half ruined from sitting out for so long. I opted to have them put it all away. Neither the cashier nor the packer uttered a single kind word. I don't know why I was apologizing, but I did - probably because they were making it clear that I had wasted their very precious time. I received no sympathy or fellow feeling or recognition that I was still a customer. No. Just those ugly glances.

I was in so much pain by this point that I was unable to walk, and when I tried to take the electric cart to my car, the stupid "sensors" did not want to let me through the door - not because you're not allowed to take the carts to your car, but because the sensors have been installed so that you won't run into the towers of groceries that I previously mentioned were placed in the aisles of the store. As I worked furiously to try to get the cart to go through the exit doors, an indignant man stood inches from me, his face black with rage. I was inconveniencing him. There was another exit door a few feet away. He could have used that, but no, he wanted to make it clear to me just how mad he was that I dared to interrupt his flow through life.  If I had been my former 21 year-old self, he would have been falling all over himself to help the pretty young disabled lady, I would bet. I finally got out the door and drove home wondering what the hell I was going to eat, since my cupboards were bare and I was hungry.

This hostility toward older and disabled people is really disturbing.  It wasn't until I'd read a sullen and resentful diatribe against "boomers" written by a Facebook connection, that I began to comprehend the strong sentiment that is being generated by our progeny and their kids. They blame all of us that were born during certain years for somehow not leaving them a nice enough world to live in, completely missing the fact that only the very wealthy among our generation had any realistic power in which to operate, and the comparative ease of the older boomer's lives was dictated by economic factors that no longer exist.

As in all ages, it is the people who have money who hold the power in the society. The rest of us just scramble to hold onto the edge of the bowl so we don't fall in. As much as I tried to educate my Facebook acquaintance about this reality, her hostility and bitterness toward all people in that generation came gushing from her in a torrent of resentful words, and I had to walk away from the negativity.

I am having a curious ride, between the ageism and the sexism and the disability prejudice and the fat shaming and the misogyny. Being a member of several vulnerable groups can be exhausting. Of course, people of color are the experts on this sort of thing, as the prejudice that is thrown at them constantly is often life threatening. At least no one has made a move to kill me when I got in their way in the grocery store.

Recently, a member of my former parish started circulating an anti-boomer meme that was couched in the form of a comic cartoon. It was really only a pretense of humor. It was bitingly mean and the kind of thing that has a corrosive effect on society, if left unchallenged. When I explained to him that it was insulting and inappropriate, he coolly told me it was a joke and that he found it funny. I tried to reason with him, but his smugness let me know that he considered this particular prejudice to be okay to cultivate and it didn't bother him if anyone was hurt by it.

I found it an odd attitude for a well-churched young man to take. Frankly, I had expected better from him, given his education, but one can't force enlightenment on anyone.  Ageism is wide spread in America. I have heard that this is less of a problem in other cultures where they revere their elders and treat them with respect, but here in the U.S., many take it for granted, assuming their prejudice has some basis in fact.

The baby boomers aren't the first generation to experience discrimination. I remember when my father hit his 40's and he was constantly telling me of the ageism that he was experiencing. He began to have trouble finding work. People dismissed him as an old hack. I discounted his constant carping and assumed that he had earned this treatment because he really did have an unpleasant personality, with no appreciation for social norms.  Clearly, I was missing some information that only experience could provide.

The prejudices expressed by those entitled young people on Facebook aren't even logical. The fact of the matter is that each generation contains all sorts of people. Some are selfish and couldn't care less about the kind of world they leave to their children and grandchildren. Some spend all their time and money on worthy causes. Some are in their own world and live for whatever hobby horse has captured their imagination. Many people - perhaps most people - just struggle to stay ahead of the daily grind.

Wages for the middle class stalled from 1970 to 2005, basically the baby boomer working years. At the same time, however, corporate profits and CEO wealth skyrocketed. Whatever value the baby boomer created by her effort benefited only the company and the executives, leaving her desperate to feed her kids and stay ahead of the repair bills on the car, which is probably why her kids resent her so much. Mom was always working. If she wasn't at her full time job, she left the kids alone in the apartment at night and on weekends while she worked her side hustle.

The kids are blaming their boomer mom for leaving them to their own devices much of the time, but it's an unfair complaint. Life got harder and harder during those working years, from 1970 to 2005. From my personal perspective, I ended up making less money in real dollars in my 40's than I had in my 20's. The economic machine was sending all the value of my work to the bank accounts of a few people at the top of the pyramid, leaving me scrabbling for table scraps that fell from above. Who can build a world for the next generation when you're survival is at stake? It is a rigged system. This is the fault of capitalism, which MUST be regulated, or it naturally results in all the money being concentrated at the top, shared with just a few people.

Older people can be repositories of great wisdom, information and inspiration. That isn't true of all elderly people, of course. You know the saying, "with age comes wisdom, but sometimes it comes alone!" To pretend that every gray haired granny is a wizened old sage would be just another type of irrational prejudice. One must recognize, though, that the wisdom of many years is certainly a latent possibility in every person of a certain age. By very definition, they have more years of experiences than the young and, even if they DO start to become a little addled, don't they deserve simple human kindness? Jesus would say so.

It would be wonderful to think that writing a blog would disabuse scores of people of the notion that older people are all losing their minds and have nothing to offer the world. I don't have a prayer of changing the entire culture, but I will do my bit here. I am the perennial advocate for the misunderstood and maligned.

If you consider yourself a spiritual person, a religious person, or a person of honor and integrity, then you must agree that prejudice is evil. Condemning someone or ridiculing anyone, based solely upon some general group to which they belong, is an injustice to that person and shouldn't be tolerated. Pretending that comical character assassinations are benign is, likewise, dishonest. Don't encourage the incorrigible by laughing and then passing on the sentiment!

Jesus clearly wanted us to be kind to one another, and that doesn't include expressing contempt toward your elders in the mistaken idea that they are somehow less than you and that therefore it is alright to be prejudiced about anyone over the age of 40. There is no prejudice that is "allowed" or is culturally acceptable. Just stop it!

My postal carrier commiserated with me today, making the observation that, "it's a very strange time in America. People are so MEAN." This is true, but we have to fight this tendency as hard as we can. This meanness is not a holy stance to take, and it is incumbent upon Christians to follow the commandments of the Lord to the best of our abilities - and that means that we are to love everyone.

Read the Beatitudes again. That's a good place to start.

God bless us all.

Silver "Rose" Parnell
"Sannyasini Kaliprana"

SET THAT ALARM CLOCK, HERMITESS!

Hermit Girl Shakuntala

by

Sudeshna Ghosh

Many devout women who find themselves alone after retirement are enthused to become hermits or informal lay religious persons. You see whispers of them in little-traveled blogs, and some write me. In the midst of the allurements of the modern world, there is still a deep calling of the spirit for this ancient, solitary and silent path. Old age naturally lends itself to it.  In fact, it was common that, at the sunset of their lives, the Hindus would take up the life of what was called 'sannyas," which only later became a state of life that could be embarked upon while still young. I took sannyas vows in my 40's.

If you are not looking to be supported by any religious institution, and if you do not pretend to any official status in the church, it is perfectly fine to embark on a dedicated life, sanctifying everything you do, every hour you breathe, and every joy you experience, to our Lord. You do not need anyone's permission. After all, you are already living alone, in some apartment or a house that has been left to you through some lucky chance or for which you worked when you were young.

There are many opinions about what constitutes a hermit or contemplative, but there are really only a couple requirements. Primarily, of course, one must be single, unmarried and unencumbered with children, otherwise your time does not belong to you alone. Hermits, or "solitaries" or whatever you call them, live alone. They are celibate and, for our purposes on this blog, the purpose for living that life is a spiritual one. There are people for whom the solitary life is a lifestyle or an escape, and it always bothers me when they are lumped in with the spiritual seeker in magazine and newspaper articles.

Modern hermitess, Rachel Denton

(Washington Post November 16, 2015)

Typically, these women are not leaving to walk into the desert or the forest, though some have done so. No. The modern mystic must pray in place, usually, because everything costs dearly these days, especially anything approaching an "inspirational" atmosphere. There are no free houses in the forests or free water in the desert, and few seniors are healthy enough to be too far removed from the medical establishment and the pharmacy, in any case.

It used to be common for the citizens of a village or town to support a local hermit or anchoress, and there were many patrons, in gratitude for their wealth, who would sponsor these virtuous individuals, giving them food and shelter and attending to their other needs, but faith and Christian charity are not what they used to be, and most tycoons of today are too busy erecting gigantic mansions and other testaments to their own importance to give thought to the needs of the humble seeker.

Didi Anuprabha

Even the common folk are contemptuous of the efforts of the contemplative. While searching for photographs to break up the text of this blog post, I was saddened to see a number of hostile comments left on the Washington Post's article about modern hermit Rachel Denton, a former Carmelite who lives as a hermit in a small village in England. The degree of ignorance about and resentment of the life of the spirit is quite high just now. Westerners are living in a period of extreme antipathy to genuine religious sentiment, and the kindness and compassion of Jesus are rarely found. Several of the commenters found fault with Rachel's simple house. They expected her to be living in a dirty shack or a cave in the forest, evidently. I would just say that, not only do we have to make do with what is available for our hermitage, we must also do our best to ignore the bitter rancor of the uninitiated and to pray for their enlightenment.

The article about Rachel can be found HERE

What is most concerning is that faith in the power of intercessory prayer is so weak, that the value of hosting a religious solitary is no longer appreciated, in general. Particularly now, we have entered an age in which the poor are vilified and, despite the blatant and continual "preference for the poor" expressed throughout the old and new testaments, prejudice against them is very intense. This increases the difficulty of the dedicated life, but when the call received in the soul is too strong to be ignored, we must respond and do the best we can to put ourselves at the disposal of our beloved, using modern means to assist us in our efforts.

Saint Ita, the Hermitess of Killeedy

In most cases, you will not take vows, though I did take the vows of a female swami ('sannyasini'), years ago, thanks to the auspices of my Vedanta teacher, Swami Swahananda. I carry these forward through my current religious life. I don't pretend to perfect adherence to all the precepts, but I take care with the traditional values of poverty and chastity which are the externals of a life lived in concert with the Divine.

First of all, as mentioned above, one has to be SINGLE, not a married woman living with husband and children. That would defy the intrinsic nature of the hermit life, which is solitary. Very occasionally, a husband and wife, with no living children, will retreat "into the forest" as did some of the Indian mystics of ancient lore and, though rare, this does happen. Before attempting it, I would recommend gaining the advice of a spiritual director, though. It is almost impossible to obey the dictates of a celibate life when living en famille. Monastic life is already difficult for most people, but there are exceptional sorts who are equally yoked with another who get on famously as a sort of miniature cenobitic monastery, a deux.

But even those of us who are single and free to give all our life to God (since no human has any claim on it) have difficulty, at times, in keeping a schedule because of the press of day-to\-day business. In my case, I am disabled, and it takes forever to get even the simplest things done. Even though my ailments prevent me from adhering to the acetic practices typically enjoined on a swami, they provide their own pains and torments that probably far outweigh the little fasts and uncomfortable sleeping arrangements and what have you. Each of us needs to find our own way, given our own unique circumstances, while ignoring the carping critics.

Swamini Vishwagodavaari Mata

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One advantage of living in community is that there is a framework of time into which one can slip oneself. You don't have to remember that meditation is at noon, nor do you need to keep your eye on the clock, because there are several outside prompts. Simply seeing your other sisters walking to the temple for noon meditation is enough. When I was a nun in the Vedanta convent, I would grab my chaddar (prayer shawl) and follow them. In some institutions, there are lovely bells that chime to announce all the "official" prayer times.

Gradually, over the years, my schedule got lost. There are numberless impediments to a meditative life when one lives in an apartment, for instance, as I do. A house is well beyond my means, but even a freestanding house is not necessarily quiet and tranquil. Friends tell me of having to endure a cacophony of jarring music, fighting neighbors, barking dogs, and the shrieks of rowdy, inebriated party guests at nearby homes.  My residence of the last 14 years has grown increasingly chaotic and boisterous, with many intrusions. Peace and quiet seem to be the dearest attributes of any habitation, and contemplation is often nearly impossible. Even reading can be a challenge, at times. These conditions are not conducive to spiritual life, but we have to try to move through it, using whatever few aids are available in the modern era. The first is ear plugs. The second is a cell phone.

Cloistered Catholic Nun

Where Catholic religious women live alone, together

Using as a model the Hollywood convent schedule from my time with the Vedanta Society of Southern California, I programmed into my phone the following skeleton schedule. [Yes, I have a smart phone. It was given to me and has become another essential tool in the arsenal of the modern hermit.]

Keep in mind that this is a skeleton schedule, meditation periods are an hour, but they can be shorter or longer, practically speaking. It just depends on what is happening that day. If I am in horrible pain, I may spend the whole day in prayer, as I am unable to do much else, physically speaking.

My schedule:

4:00 a.m. Rise
6:00 a.m. meditation
7:00 a.m. breakfast
11:00 a.m. Elevenses (tea & bisquits)
12:00 p.m. prayers & meditation
1.00 p.m. Lunch
3:00 p.m. Divine Mercy Chaplet ( on Fridays and special feast days)
4:00 p.m. Tea
6:00 p.m. prayer & meditation (108 on my prayer rope)
7:00 p.m. dinner
9:00 p.m. bed

Keep in mind that one's entire day is supposed to be conducted in the spirit of prayer, so that even periods of work, the fruits of which are offered to the Lord, become part of the overall meditative endeavor. Mindfulness must be carried through all of it.

Now, there is a lot that I have to squeeze into that schedule, but I don't want an alarm for absolutely everything, so I am writing down the other items and will keep the full list somewhere near my living room altar. I need to apportion my work time between my writing and my painting which, in addition to the housework necessary to maintain myself, constitute what would be recognized as "work" by secular society.

The amount of time you will be able to dedicate to prayer will vary, according to your station in life, but every one of us has SOME portion of time that is free. Just do the best you can, and remember that brother Lawrence used to say that he was as much with the Lord amongst his pots and pans as he would be in the choir stall.

Brother Lawrence

To the other mystics among us, I encourage you not to lose heart. You can partake of the mystical life, even if beset with many duties and barking dogs. I have been living this life since 2003 and have probably made all the mistakes and have had all the setbacks. Feel free to write me for encouragement. In the meantime, try setting the alarm clock and see if that helps you.

God bless us all

Silver Rose

TAKE REFUGE IN THE SILENCE

We are living in an era I find particularly unnerving. The right wing cult is obsessed about symbolic issues like whether or not they feel comfortable saying "Merry Christmas" to random strangers who don't respond in kind, whether a football player should stand or kneel during an anthem, and whether I should use the moniker "concentration camps" to describe the cruel treatment of children locked in cages at the border and fed frozen food (still frozen and uncooked)  because the cultist's dear grandpa lived through a Nazi death camp and HIS suffering was real, whereas the suffering of the unrelated brown children is NOT.

I am horrified, not by symbolic insults to my philosophical identity, but by descriptions of real children and babies, forced into cramped, squalid, and harsh circumstance, where they have fallen ill, are not properly fed, are suffering the strain of separation from their parents, and missing any surrogate to take the place of a loving mother. Some of the children have died. The articles describe the trauma of a 2 year-old that has been carelessly thrust on a group of pre-teen girls who were told to care for him. He went days without food, he is ill, missing his diaper, snot from his runny nose covering his dirty shirt - with no mother to hold him. He clings to the little girls who have been randomly assigned his care.

On social media, I am constantly slammed for daring to sympathize with the children. "They broke the LAW!" is what many of the self righteous hotly proclaim, and "this started with OBAMA!" and "abortion is more important!" The justifications and obfuscations are jarring. Jesus weeps.

Numerous sexual assaults on the children have been reported. The cognitive dissonance of the pep rally freak show of Donald Trump in Florida, entertaining his red-hat base, who are keening "lock her up!" in an ecstasy of hate, at the same time that thousands of children are being willfully traumatized at the border is really more than I can bear.

While I am constitutionally incapable of behaving like an ostrich and hiding my head in the proverbial sand, in order to keep from hearing the moans and cries of the real, actual children who are suffering at our hands, I have to take a break now and then and touch base with my source, the ground of all being, my creator. In the midst of the caterwauling chaos, I take refuge in silence.

To truly live in silence, the inner voice must be stilled. Thank God for the meditation instructions, the inspiration of the holy ones, the examples of the saints and sages. To save my sanity, I need to spend some time every day floating in silence. To stop putting out words and thoughts and concepts into the ether, and to wait, instead, for the breath of God, is crucial to the sustenance of the inner life.

Human society is full of horrors. I suppose it always has been. We often make a big deal out of simple kindness, since it is simply rare, in light of the whole picture of human activity. "Fireman saves puppy by risking his own life," the article says, while countless others detail dozens of stories in which not so nice people are doing not so nice things to scores of other humans. There is a cacophony of misery.

Some eras are worse than others. There seems to be an ebb and flow to it. Often, it feels manipulated and deliberate, guided by the hands of a small group of people who have a lot to gain, financially, if they steer the story in a way that tugs at the heart strings or pumps up the volume on the self-righteous rhetoric that gets some people swelling their chests and jumping into causes they do not fully understand.

Today, Trump is flirting with starting a war with Iran after our very expensive, big drone was shot out of the sky. Concurrently, certain right wing extremists are publishing online "news" proclaiming the start of  civil war if Trump isn't re-elected in 2020. In the halls of government in Washington, D.C., obstructionist Trumpist Republicans are desperately trying to drive the hearings away from the corruption and criminal activities of this administration which has indicted 34 of the president's associates (some of whom are in prison), and back onto Hillary Clinton's e-mails, a topic that floats, untethered to any relevant train of thought and definitely has no causal relationship to the challenges at the border, Trump's high crimes and misdemeanors, Trump's willingness to let Russians interfere with our elections (again), or the impending conflict with Iran.

It is all so tawdry and disgusting and petty.

In my little personal world, I find that taking care of an aging and ill body takes up a remarkable amount of time. Housekeeping is interminable. Hauling the detritus from one spot to another more organized spot, washing dishes, washing clothes, watering plants, "walking" the service dog (with my scooter) - on and on. Whilst my day-to-day activities have me dragging my body and possessions back and forth across the land, making little progress in anything useful, other than survival, in my meditations I can soar.

I woke very early this morning and drank at the spring of quietude for some time. I will go back many times today.  At the beginning of each interlude of stillness, I bring all this chaos and lay it at the feet of the Lord, with all the earnestness that my heart can carry. I unburden myself and ask Him for his assistance. Please, Lord, I understand your commitment to free will and all that, but could you step in before things get out of hand?

Confident that God's got this, I dive in.

Peace be with you.

Silver Rose

GO TO HEAVEN TODAY

Saint Teresa of Avila

Close-up, portion of statue

"Asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would

come, he said in reply, 'The coming of he kingdom of God

cannot be observed, and no one will announce, 'Look, here 

it is,' or, "There is its.' For behold, the kingdom of God is

among you."

Luke 17:20-21

Thirty five years ago, after a particularly traumatic life event, I decided I needed to learn how to meditate. I didn't know how to start or where to go, so I searched the yellow pages in the phone book. There, among a host of other strange-sounding options, was the Vedanta Society of Northern California. I misread the number, evidently, dialing what turned out to be the private number of the reigning swami at the time, Swami Shraddhananda. He kept saying, "how did you get this number?" I suspect divine intervention.

I learned a lot during my years with the Vedanta Society - mostly at the Southern California base in Hollywood. I lived on the  property in the Hollywood Hills, where I was also a nun in the convent for a few years. I write about that at length in my book.

It was surprising to me that there are so many similarities as regard to meditation practice, among the different world religions. I took to it right away and, I think partly because of the hyperconcentration of the PTSD sufferer, I was able to concentrate my attention.

In the decades since my introduction to meditation, I have been very grateful for my Vedanta training, especially the private instructions given me by my teacher, Swami Swahanandaji, a most revered swami. He was a surrogate father to me and, out of everything he taught me, the meditation is what I call upon most frequently.

Despite chronic illness and pain, the meditation practice has kept me hopeful, with the strong feeling that God is forever with me, that we are connected, that we are "one." After many years of practice, meditation can be done in any position, any time of day and during almost any other activity - at least activities that do not require discursive thought. Housekeeping and other repetitive tasks are the best.

If you have read anything about the Catholic Carmelite Brother Lawrence of the Resurrection, you will be familiar with the Practice of the Presence of God, which is a type of meditation. All he had to do was turn his attention to the Lord while he was washing the pots and pans or peeling potatoes or any one of a number of menial tasks that the other monks preferred not to do. Brother Lawrence was deemed unsuitable to become a priest. He could not sing the Daily Office as he had no facility with Latin. It is said that he wasn't very intelligent, but he was close to God. He said that he was as close to God, among his pots and pans, as if he were in the choir stall, singing the Gregorian Chant.

The kingdom of God is not something that happens for us at some future time. It is within us now, and "all" we need to do is turn our attention to it. When we want to connect with the Lord, we can confidently turn our attention to Him within and sit with Him. Buddhist students will find this very familiar, and it seems to me that, when Jesus said that the Kingdom of God is within us, He was telling us how to "go" to Heaven right now. The degree to which we are able to do this is the degree to which we are detached from the world.

Detachment, in Hinduism, Buddhism and Christianity, is variously described, but to illustrate it in Christian terms is to say that a perfect example of this is when it is announced in the Bible that the love of money is the root of all evil. It is not the money that causes the problem, it is our attachment to it. Detachment from it is so difficult that it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven.

Christianity talks about sins, and it seems to me that all of these sins are different ways in which we are attached to something other than the Divine. The concept is simple, but the practice is not, because we are expected to appreciate the world without being attached to it, and it is like walking on the razor's edge.

Those of you who were baptized as adults will remember that you were asked to renounce Satan, which is another way of saying that you resolve to be detached from evil, such as selfishness. Think of it: if you are attached to some evil, you cannot be submerged in God. God cannot accept into himself such darkness. The story about Satan being thrown from the Heavens is meant to convey that the evils of selfishness and arrogance can not be accommodated in the Kingdom of God, who is all Good, all Light, all Truth and all Beauty.



The more that we ourselves are attached to the goodness of God, the Light, the Truth and the Beauty of Him, the more we are part of that Heavenly realm. We do not "go" to Heaven. Rather, we open ourselves to be penetrated by and submerged in the Lord. Our behavior on this plane gives a clue to the disposition of our mind. If our mind continually rests on the Lord, it will express itself in a holy life. Everything is interconnected.

This topic is on my mind today, as I have entered a period of more intense pain and a gathering of ominous, new, and uncomfortable symptoms. But I have been able to rest in a blessed mood because of the mindful practice of the presence of God, for which I am very grateful.

The Kingdom of God is within us. It is my prayer that we are all able to throw off our dark attachments and meet one another in the light.

God bless us all

Silver "Rose"
Sannyasini Kaliprana

THE LEGACY OF TRUMP

As bizarre as this sounds, there is a sizable number of Christians who regard Donald Trump as a messiah. They believe that he has been sent by God to protect a Christian nation, and that he is a savior, of sorts. Despite the fact that Trump's behaviors and policies are less Christian than any other politician on either side of the aisle at any time in history, his evangelical supporters are willing to excuse all of it. I don't think it would ever occur to me to write about politics were it not for this weird and astonishing circumstance.

I myself was planning on voting for Trump, until the Access Hollywood tapes came out and I heard him say those horrible things and how he grabs women "by the p---y" and that was IT for me. The more I learned about him, the more I could not imagine him as president, so, despite my antipathy toward Hillary Clinton, I voted for her.

It was blatantly obvious to me that Trump was creepy and dangerous, and I was just stunned when he was elected. Granted, he LOST the popular vote by several million people and was put in office by the auspices of the Electoral College (a mystifying and nonsensical peculiarity of American democracy) but it frightens me that so many Americans, after hearing his disgusting comments and watching his outlandish antics, would not only vote for him, but hotly defend every crackpot thing he has done and said since - against all rational sense.

Speaking as a woman who has a wicked case of PTSD , thanks to rapes and assaults, the idea that this guy is president makes me really uneasy. He promotes grabbing women by their genitals without so much as a 'by your leave"; there are more than a dozen women suing him for that very thing (he claims they are lying); the hearing for his appointment of would-be rapist Kavanaugh to the bench was a nightmare (complete with yet another assault on the impeccable character of his ersatz victim); and, with the name-calling and generally vulgar attitude he broadly and publicly displays toward women, in general, if it weren't for my meditation practice, I would be a certifiable basket case.

I have had many days, when Trump's misogyny and explicit prejudice against disabled people have flowed into my life from random strangers, like that grocery store employee who claimed he believed in "Trump's law" and that I was not disabled enough to suit him so, in his eyes, I did not deserve to use my handicap parking placard. On days like that, when the PTSD has been activated by Trump lovers, it has been impossible to maintain my typically cheerful self.

Trump has cost me friends and the support of some of my Catholic community where I live. A few have dropped me from Facebook and shunned me at church because of him. Pointing out the lies and misbehaviors of Trump is "hateful," according to them. In order to keep their friendship, I would have been required to stick to the fantasy script that he is the messiah come to save us from the gays, the immigrants, the blacks, the browns, and the poor . I do not respond well to emotional blackmail, and I will be damned if I will pretend that wrong is right and bad is good in order to stay in the good graces of people who ought to know better.

A small number of relatives, with whom I was not emotionally close, did likewise. None of them speak to me now because I have had the temerity to point out that which is readily apparent to the rest of us. I am not a perfect person, but at least I aspire to the core values of Christ. Trump doesn't.

The idea that these Trump supporters cannot see what is right in front of their eyes gives me chills up my spine - because he is such an extreme case of explicit corruption. This psychological drama is like the worst horror movie I've ever seen. I used to wonder how these people would cope when they finally realized the amount of danger to which we have been subjected because of their slavish devotion to Trump, but it is slowly sinking in that they never will. I have to accept that this is the way things will be for probably the rest of my life. They'll never be able to admit what they have done, especially to themselves.

Thankfully, most Americans (and most people all over the world) see him for what he is: a craven, mentally unbalanced, morally and ethically bankrupt con artist - a wastrel who, after being given millions of dollars by Daddy, spent his life taking advantage wherever he could, at the expense of innocent people, a man whose level of narcissism is malignant. I also suspect, and I have read the opinion of a host of psychiatrists and doctors who agree, that he may be entering into a phase of some sort of dementia, probably having to do with the progression of disease and/or old age. Some days, his language is such a hash of words that he appears to be barely lucid. Who knows if all the cheeseburgers have clogged his arteries and rotted his brain, or whether he just has some as-yet diagnosed illness? In any case, not only is he temperamentally 'unsuited' for the job of president (that word doesn't do it justice), he is positively dangerous. Saying this makes me "hateful" in the eyes of the Trump lovers.

Once someone decides to shield their eyes and ears from the blatant, obvious, in-your-face reality of Trump, that decision imprisons them.  In order to maintain the fairy tale of Messiah Trump, they can't watch any news program except Fox, or they will hear a truthful narrative from all the professional journalists.  They choose to believe Trump's preposterous claim that CNN and other traditional news outlets are in some kind of conspiracy against him and that publications with strict journalistic standards have all thrown away decades of integrity in order to conspire to spread the exact same lies about him. (I wonder where they MEET? Is there a giant video chat, or what? Do they vote on the lie of the week?)

True believers can't read any news except extremist right wing rags. They will listen to what Trump says about the Mueller Report before they will believe anything Mueller himself says about it, and they will not read the report which IS available. These people won't even take the direction of the POPE, calling instead for the Pope's expulsion from the church on the basis of heresy because his guidance disagrees with Trump's view of the world. The Pope as much as blatantly stated that Trump is not Christian, criticizing his stupid sea-to-sea wall. All of this sounds like a science fiction movie - but it's real.

Walter Cronkite is rolling in his grave.

As I have mentioned before, I know a few people who voted for Trump because he promised to nominate right wing judges - and he has done that. Trump doesn't appear to really care about the Supreme Court. I doubt he understands its role, given how little he appears to know or care about any of the functions of government or basic principles of jurisprudence. His handlers have given him the list from The Federalist Society (another nightmare topic) and he dutifully proposes only the people on that approved list. People in the pro-life community whose focus is making abortion a criminal act are willing to let the rest of government fall down around our ears in service to this one goal. They see some of the craziness of Trump but they don't care because they are getting the judges they want. I am pro-life, but I don't agree with this tragic compromise because it is endangering our democratic process and putting America in real peril from foreign enemies to whom Trump has cozied up and/or aggravated.

I feel, and I have been saying from the beginning, that Trump will do his best to get us embroiled in a war in order to both distract us from his crimes and to lengthen his time in office. As I also predicted, he is making a tremendous amount of money from foreign governments, pouring money into his businesses, as well as the American taxpayer who have been hosting his adult children and in-laws at Trump's luxury resorts for golf trips and "meetings" held at Trump's luxury properties. The partisan Attorney General that he placed at the head of the Department of Justice has engineered a change to the interpretation of the laws around the emoluments clause of the constitution, to the effect that the president should be allowed to receive unlimited amounts of money from foreign governments, as long as those payments are washed through businesses owned by the president. This is very convenient to Trump, whose fortunes were flagging before becoming president. The longer he can extend his presidency, the more money he can pull into his businesses, and the more regulations he can remove for businessmen like himself, ensuring his future further enrichment. Money is usually at the bottom of all corruption, and his administration is no different.

The MOST ironic thing about all this is that I originally became attracted to the Catholic faith, not only because of the mystics but because the values of Jesus Christ appealed to me. Now, I find myself part of a group of people, many of whom have abandoned these values for political expediency. It is heartbreaking for me, personally.

Between the huge sex abuse scandals and this wholehearted embrace of a toxic political administration that promotes unChristian values, the Catholic Church is getting a real hit, as far as reputation is concerned.

I realize that this post is somewhat rambling. This IS a diary, after all, but I should sum up my thoughts, and here it is:

I believe in the values of Jesus Christ and I won't abandon them, even if a large group of my fellow Catholics have traded them in for Republican talking points and have embraced the most unChristian of all politicians. I will not be dissuaded from trying, to the best of my ability, to follow the precepts of the church, and I will also throw myself into my meditation and prayer life with greater devotion. The only peace I get these days is from my meditation, formal and informal, where I tune in to the Divine and leave all the rest of this behind. I am sorry to be traveling this road alone, but I have been an accidental hermit for so long now that giving up the last shred of hope for community life or spiritual support is not such a stretch for me. The Lord does step in and assist me when necessary.

As I was writing this, two things happened. The first was a heated exchange between a reporter and one of Trump's people on the CBS Sunday Morning show in regard to Iran and its supposed attempt to blow up a ship in the Gulf of Hormuz. If he plays his cards right, Trump will get that war he has been wanting.

The other thing that happened as I was writing this: I was dropped by another ersatz "Catholic" who lives in my town. She defriended me on Facebook without a word, and when I questioned her about it, it was because of Donald Trump. This is how they keep the bubble small and the message consistent. God save them.



Silver Rose

ADJUSTABLE BED AND OTHER BIG GIRL FURNITURE NEEDED

I came to New Mexico with only what I could fit in my little Toyota, thinking I could replace my furniture when I started working, but very soon after I got here, I became completely disabled and my Social Security is not enough to purchase furniture.

A friend from church gave me a recliner that I have been sleeping in for a couple of years, and a pink leather couch that I just love - but I desperately need a real bed that adjusts for my painful disabilities, as well as some furniture on which to work, write and paint and in which to store art supplies, paints, yarn, etc.

There is a neighbor in my complex who I can pay to put together the furniture. He used to do it professionally, lucky for me.

I have picked out the least expensive options that would work in my apartment. Amazon has my address and will ship to me direct.

Please take a look at my DONATION WISH LIST HERE

If you cannot afford any of the items on the list, but you would like to donate, please click on the PAYPAL DONATION LINK, to the right.

You know, most of my life I spent in a very minimalist style, living mainly on the floor, but I will be 65 this year, and I can't get up off the floor, once I get down there - so it's time to live like a grownup, don't you think?

God bless us all, and thank you.

Silver Rose

GOD LURES US GENTLY TO HIM

The Annunciation

Many times, I have explained to the hot headed among us that God does not use force as a method of ensuring obedience.

"If you love me, keep my commandments"

~ John 14:15 ~

The Lord knows that true love will inspire us to follow in His path. When He created us, He gave us free will and He uses enticements and gentle allurements to bring us to Him. He never forces or accuses. He doesn't use any kind of punishment to bring us to Him. It is always a free will offering.

He could have decreed that Mary be the mother of Jesus, for instance. Instead, he sent his angel to ask her if she would accept it. He needed her "yes," her fiat.

When I first came to New Mexico, I had a quote written on a little piece of paper that I had kept in my wallet for several years:

"I will lead her into the desert, and there I

will speak to her heart."

~ Hosea 2:14 ~

Any inspiration that I receive in meditation or contemplation is rooted in Love. Whatever action I may be encouraged to follow, if it truly comes from our Lord, is gentle and flows easily. I am not called to take anyone to task or adopt a harsh demeanor, unless my ego is too activated. In which case, the "inspiration" has to be abandoned.

Richard Rohr has written a beautiful meditation in the orbit of this theme:

"If a voice comes from accusation and leads to accusation,

it is quite simply the voice of the "Accuser," which is the 

literal meaning of the biblical word "Satan." Shaming,

accusing, or blaming is simply not how God talks. God is

supremely nonviolent. God only cajoles, softens, and 

invites us into an always bigger field and it is always a

unified field."

† Richard Rohr †

There are times when we are sure we are "right" about a topic - and we may very well be "right" - then we get overly involved in discussions with friends or on social media. I have fallen into that trap, at times. We are well meaning. We want to spread "the Truth" around. It may be the "Truth" with a capital "T" but is it God's will that we spread the word? Never mind if it is a "holy" topic. That is not enough to guarantee that God is asking us to champion it.

I am so grateful to read Richard Rohr's wonderful words today.  It is a blessing to be reminded of what we know, isn't it?

God bless us all
Silver Rose

GOD IS TRUTH

"The Devil was a murderer from the beginning,

not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in

him. When he lies, he speaks his native language,

for he is a liar and the father of lies."

~ John 8:44 ~

Christians with even the slightest Christian education know that lying is a terrible sin and that God is Truth in the ultimate sense. In the Ten Commandments, there is the admonishment not to give "false witness," there is the story of Annanias and Saphira, who were struck dead on the spot for lying to the Apostles, and most directly in the quote I have provided from John 8, we are told that Satan is the father of all lies. While the Lord is all truth, all goodness, all light, Satan is the opposite, and where you find a plethora of lies is exactly where you have found Satan, because Satan is the original author of every lie that is ever told.

The liar and those who repeat lies will have to answer for it on judgment day. Every lie that is told and willfully repeated without any effort to determine the authenticity of it is an occasion on which the "Christian" has said "yes" to Satan, the father of all lies, and "no" to God, thereby violating their baptismal covenant with Jesus, and establishing themselves as a servant of the dark one.

I realize the language sounds a bit archaic, but matters of heaven and hell often do.

Satan whispers into the ear of Jesus

We have a president who has told the American public more than 10,000 lies since coming into office. These lies are proven. These lies are not even hidden. There are copious videos that prove his lies.

There are also countless articles listing, demonstrating, and linking to proof that Trump is continually lying. His lying is EASILY proven. He constantly misrepresents himself and others, yet some self-described Christians repeat his lies. All they would have to do is watch the videos, read the articles and, most especially, read the Mueller Report if they want to learn about the most egregious lies and how they figure into his multiple crimes.

I am not telling you for whom you should vote. Voting is a political calculation. For instance, I have some friends for whom making abortion illegal is all they care about. They'd put their money on a barn-sour nag if they thought it would make abortion go away. Many of them will say, "all politicians lie," ignoring the fact that no one lies to the massive degree that Trump does. He is a world class, bald faced, unrepentant liar. In fact, he is the most prolific liar EVER.

You vote for who you vote for - but you don't have to repeat and perpetuate lies. That's what I'm talking about: THE LIES.

Instead of being a tool in the hand of Satan, check your statements with nonpartisan, reliable arbiters of fact. In the public sphere, that would be

FACT CHECK

SNOPES

POLITIFACT

REUTERS NEWS SERVICE

There is no excuse to remain ignorant of the Truth, particularly if you are repeating the lies that are being employed to advance a political agenda.

I have a feeling that some Christians are repeating the lies and hatred of Trump and his cronies because they think that they have to do that in order to be considered a supporter of his and thereby a supporter of the hobby horse that made them vote for him to begin with.

Though the cognitive dissonance of supporting your hobby horse on the one hand and decrying the lies and dishonesty on the other may drive you mad, welcome to the club. I support the social justice platform of the democrats but I dislike the amoral engineering, such as when they talk about abortion being "health care" or act like it is some kind of positive good, which I find bizarre.

Neither party is suited to a Christian worldview, and that's just a fact. We are all trying to do the best we can to vote for what appears to be the least injurious platform, in a holistic sense, without losing our souls in the process.

Support what you find that is good but don't perpetuate the lies. Don't take on the sins of Trump and his minions or you will suffer for them personally.

Silver Rose

CONTEMPLATING FATIMA

Today is one of my favorite celebrations of our Lady in the Catholic calendar, the Memorial of Our Lady of Fatima. It memorializes one of the few modern, "certifiable" and certainly the most documented series of miraculous occurrences confirmed with objective proofs.

We actually have photographs of "the Miracle of the Sun" which appeared in the skies of the country of Portugal. Thousands of people experienced this phenomenal event, which was reported upon in the newspapers of the day.

Thousands of people watch "The Miracle of the Sun"

near Fatima, Portugal

Today marks the first of a series of apparitions seen by three children who lived in the tiny neighborhood of Aljustrel, which was part of Fatima Township. The apparitions began on May 13, 1917 in a place called Cova da Iria, part of the land that belonged to the parents of Lucia dos Santos. Lucia, age 10, was playing with Francisco (9) and Jacinta Marto (7) when the children suddenly saw two flashes like lightning, the announcement that something cosmically important was about to happen.

Jacinta Marto, Francisco Marto, and Lucia dos Santos

Seers of the miracle of Our Lady of Fatima

During that first apparition, Our Lady floated above a giant Holm Oak tree (which still exists today) and spoke to the children, specifically Lucia, and explained that she was from Heaven and had come to ask the children to come back to that same spot on the thirteenth day of the month for six months, at the same hour.

She told them many things, including the disposition of the souls of loved ones and extracted a very special promise from the children, that they would "offer themselves to God to endure all the sufferings that He may be pleased to send them, as both an act of reparation for the sins with which He is offended and an act of supplication for the conversion of sinners." They were promised that they would have much to suffer, but that God, by his grace, would comfort them.

The Holm Oak

At such a young age, to agree to such a life of suffering, is really a remarkable thing, in my mind, and highlights the unique temperament of these children. God doesn't pick these people randomly, you see.

Now, I could stop this story right here, and we already have a substantial orientation for contemplation and meditation. First, we would circle our mind around the tableaux of the three children encountering the Blessed Mother unexpectedly in an out-of-the-way place; their breathless, rapt attention to her image and her words and requests; and the astonishing agreement to live a life of suffering in reparation of the sins of the world. Could we make such an agreement?

The three child seers, intent upon the image of

Our Lady

Imagine oneself as one of the children, gazing upon the image of Our Lady, and place Her in your heart, gazing upon her there. Focusing upon her image, sit with Her and wait for Her to speak to your heart. If distracting thoughts come, put them aside and return your attention to our beautiful Lady within yourself.

There is much more to this story, as I've mentioned, including "The Miracle of the Sun" witnessed by thousands, and you can read about all these in the internet articles and the books written about this remarkable series of events. In fact, I encourage you to do so, partly because the astounding appearances HAVE been verified by so many and we have newspaper pictures and accounts. Thus, we can absolutely rely upon the veracity of the story and can safely take guidance and inspiration from it.

Enjoy this beautiful day!

Silver "Rose"
Copyright (c) 2019
All rights reserved

BLESSED SISTER MARIA GABRIELLA SAGHEDDU

Blessed Sister Maria Gabriella Sagheddu

1914-1939

My readers know I love to pick out the few women among the saints of the day because they're usually not discussed very much unless they happen to be one of the rare women that has garnered big attention throughout history. Today's choice is another of "the hidden ones" that I love to learn about, and then I pass it on to you. (She is a blessed, which is the first stage toward becoming a saint.)

The constant pains and disabilities that have grown on me and trapped me in their clutches have limited my ability to keep this habit on a daily basis. Also, there is often not a single female saint on any given day for whom the church has dedicated that day to her. I do not think it likely that there are fewer women who deserve sainthood than men. It is a comment on our religious culture that women are less noticed or highly regarded. This goes hand-in-hand with the culture, in general.

Do we expect women to be more religious and therefore we ignore them unless they're miracle machines? I don't know. Whatever the case, I like to pick out the women from the sometimes very long list of saints for each day and concentrate on those.

Another issue is that we seem to know so much less about these female saints than the male saints, making it doubly hard for women to find role models of the mystical life. Well, we'll just have to break new ground, won't we?

So, today we have Sister Maria Gabriella Sagheddu. She was a Trappist nun born in 1914, who is known as a patron of ecumenism because she was devoted to the concept of Christian unity, which strikes a chord with me, as I am keen on religious unity, such as can be experienced to whatever degree possible, given the different religious orientations. Blessed Sister Sagheddu clung to the idea that everyone would become one in Jesus Christ.

Years ago, when I was a nun in the Vedanta convent, we were all so excited to watch this series of talks with Bill Moyers and Joseph Campbell called "The Power of Myth." I highly recommend it, if you can get a copy. It's probably on Youtube, come to think of it. I can't really do it justice in explaining its effect on me, but it often highlighted the similarities among different religions, which was a great education for me. We all have more in common than you might realize.

The Catholic Church is the home of Christian ecumenism, and I am sure this idea will surprise some people who think that everything that is not strictly Catholic is automatically "demonic."  It is too bad, because they miss a lot. If you read the Catechism, you come across this idea that, if a person lives their life in a Christlike way, they are already part of the body of Christ, perhaps without even knowing it themselves. It makes sense, doesn't it? Truth and authenticity just shines through this concept. Jesus IS Truth, and the church recognizes this. Jesus said that those who love him follow his commandments, so, even if you don't know him and have never heard of him, if you are living his commandments, you must love him in some mysterious, mystical way.  In some way, you are part of the body of Christ if you behave in a Christ-like manner.

Maria Sagheddu was one of eight children born to shepherds in a small town in Sardinia. From all accounts, she was an ordinary child, with faults and bits of brilliance combined. She was a very good student, but had a mercurial personality at times, such as when her mother told her to throw out some potato peelings after preparing the evening meal. She argued, then threw them out, then went and got them back again. Who knows what was going through her mind and whether some sense of asceticism and thriftiness was offended?

She had a tendency toward severity with the children to whom she had begun to teach the catechism when young, and the priest replaced her stick with which she used to punish them. He gave her a note to use patience, rather than the stick. Though a strong personality, she took the correction and altered her method from that time forward.

It seems a shame that she died less than 2 years after making her vows with the Trappists. She had offered herself as a spiritual sacrifice for the unification of the Christian Church during a special week dedicated to it in 1938. God took her at her word and brought her home to himself the next year.

She was only 25 when she died of tuberculosis, but it just shows us that one's mission in life is realized in God's time, long or short.

God bless us all.

Silver Rose

JESUS PUNISHED THE RICH, BUT NEVER THE POOR

As I listen to and read world news, I am disturbed by a furious trend toward punishment as the cure for every societal ill, real or imagined

Recently, for instance, I heard that the small country of Brunei has just passed a law that adulterous and homosexual acts will be punished by stoning to death.

Stoning to death.

In our country, we have a so-called "president" who instituted  a policy that directly caused thousands of children to be taken away from their parents and incarcerated in cement-floored holding cells for an indeterminate time, with no plan in place as to how the children and parents would ever be reunited - all because the family came to this country, fleeing poverty and gangs, hoping for a better life.

Their kids were taken from them because, essentially,

their papers were not in order.

Donald Trump claims, falsely, that President Obama did the same thing. He did not. Trump is lying, once again. While the occasional incidental separation of children from parents convicted of serious crimes DID take place during the Obama administration, Trump's "Zero Tolerance Policy," as announced by Jeff Sessions (many videos available of the day he announced it) is what caused a huge uptick in the number of case of children separated from their families - so much so that the incarceration of these children and the conditions under which this was carried out, is a major scandal of this administration, in part because of the THOUSANDS of children and families thus brutalized.

I could write quite a bit about the punitive temperament of Donald Trump, but I just can't bear to let my mind touch him any more than I absolutely have to, other than to say that he and the people he represents form a large block of humans whose orientation tends toward harsh penalties, incarceration, and cruel practices.

"Sell your possessions and give alms; make yourselves purses

which do not wear out, an unfailing treasure in heaven, where no

thief comes near, nor moth destroys. For where your treasure is,

there will your heart be also."

Luke 12:44

I have observed that the people who ignore Christ's preference for the poor, and the Biblical injunctions against the amassing of wealth, are the same people who, with angry hearts, continually castigate the poor and disadvantaged. They are the ones who revel in the punishment of lawbreakers. To them, harsh worldly laws that target the poor and disadvantaged, are more important than the commandments of Jesus and the apostles, despite many of them advertising themselves as the best Christians ever. They are the modern Pharisees.

It is all smoke and mirrors, sleight of hand, and

the Wizard of Oz behind the curtain; meant to

distract attention from the disobedience of the

modern day Pharisees for whom commerce is

their God.

To combat our cultural tendency toward this harsh punitive orientation, we need to cultivate the love of Christ and advocate for the poor and disadvantaged, just as he and his Biblical forbears did. Resist the political narrative that encourages hatred of desperate immigrants who come here searching for peace, safety, and survival. Resist the lies and obfuscations that would have everyone believe that massive numbers of people are "gaming the system," "faking disability," and illegally obtaining food for their children at our expense.

The Pharisees are using gullible people to advance their agenda, which is to further enrich themselves while feigning religiosity at the same time. In doing so, they are twisting and torturing the Christian faith beyond all recognition.

Try to stay focused on the heart of Christ and his commandments. I recommend meditation on His words. Ignore the countless justifications for cruelty that the Pharisees present to us.  Concentrate on the heart of Jesus' message, his continual preference for the poor and disadvantaged, and everything good will flow from there.

"If you wish to be complete, go and sell your

possessions and give to the poor, and you shall

have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me."

Matthew 19:20

May the Lord submerge your heart in His love.

Silver

ARE YOU TOO COOL TO BE SYMPATHETIC TO THE PAIN OF OTHERS?

"Rejoice with them that rejoice;

weep with them that weep."

Romans 12:15

I have many happy days in my retirement, despite painful disabilities, and if you ask me, "how are you?" on any given day, I will usually say that I am "great" or something similar, but there are days, like this one, when I wake up to excruciating pain and can barely walk, but walk I must. Anyone who lives in an apartment with a dog knows what I am talking about. We are in service to the animals - especially first thing in the morning when they just have to get outside to accomplish their ablutions.

So, there I am, with little doggy bag in hand, and a neighbor asks me how I am and I tell him that today I woke in horrible pain - that the change in weather got to my bones.

Instead of expressing sympathy, the guy completely ignored what I had said and started talking about what a great day he was having.

I have seen various iterations of this type of thing. The men tend to ignore the comment about pain and will pretend they haven't heard it. Or perhaps they DON'T hear it. I am not quite sure about that. The women, especially if the conversation is on Facebook, will usually give some unsolicited advice, laden with criticism for daring to "complain" about pain. (I often say that THIS is why men are in charge of the world. Women are too busy criticizing one another and flapping their lips around rumors and gossip.)

Sometimes, I am gifted with some cosmic poo poo armchair philosophy that demands that I not mention the pain when asked, but that I should be "grateful" instead, and I should "count my blessings." This is a nasty thing to do to someone. What it communicates is a negative assessment of one's character.

I have my own unsolicited advice for these people. If you do not care about the well-being of the person, don't ask. If you DO care, and you hear that the person is in agony of pain, then be sympathetic.

First of all, sympathy is healing and peace-inducing. Read the chapter of the quote above and consider why Saint Paul recommends it. I would also like to point out that sympathy is free. It doesn't cost you anything to be sympathetic to the sufferings of others, so why not be sympathetic?

If your reaction to someone else's expression of pain or unhappiness is irritation, what does that say about YOU? Perhaps you think your precious time is being wasted, or perhaps you do not know what to say. In that case, let me tell you. Use some version of this:

"I am so sorry to hear that! I hope it gets better soon."

Put some warmth in your voice and add a smile, if you can manage it and if you haven't given out your daily allotment of smiles.

I find it odd that I have to write a blog post like this one. It seems a no-brainer to me. I try to always be sympathetic and, if I am close to the person, I might ask if there is anything I can do to help alleviate whatever the complaint happens to be. I don't consider it my right to "train" the person in the art of pretending there is nothing wrong. It is not healthy to make other people erect a false front of blissful, uncomplaining perfection because it is a big fat lie.

Life is messy and sometimes painful. For those of us with chronic illnesses and disabilities, it is QUITE painful at times. Pretending otherwise is a waste of time. Now, if you want to pretend that your life is perfect and if you have a personal philosophy that requires you to never admit to a pain or difficulty, that's your business. Go ahead! Pretend the day away, but don't burden the rest of the world with your criteria.

To be fair, I have to visit the other side of this troubling coin, and that is the fact that there are people in the world who do nothing BUT complain. I had a person like this in my life for some time. The woman complained to me constantly, despite the fact that her life is much more advantaged than mine. She's been married to the same man her whole adult life. They have a bunch of great children. They own a large home in a really good part of town. Her husband makes good money, and they frequently travel overseas on vacation.

This woman did nothing but complain about her blessings. Example: She would complain that a specially formulated medicine cost $500.00. She had the money to pay for it. She was complaining that it was expensive. Or was she bragging? I was never sure. The fact that she was complaining about spending $500.00 on medicine to a woman who goes WITHOUT many things she needs felt like abuse to me.

There is no reason to entertain people like this - people who complain about their blessings. That is a different kind of pretense entirely. After trying to get this person to understand that she was punching down on me by complaining about her blessings to someone who had so much less than she, I finally had to stop talking to her on the phone. She didn't try to draw me back in or to modulate her inconsiderate behavior. She just stepped up her litany of complaints to other people.

Even THIS person got my sympathy when she wasn't complaining about her advantages.

My bottom line is that, unless you're dealing with a person who complains about her good fortune, please just try to be a little sympathetic.

Silver Rose

(Sannyasini Kaliprana)

Silver Cottage Ashram Hermitage

Albuquerque, New Mexico

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