We are living in an era I find particularly unnerving. The right wing cult is obsessed about symbolic issues like whether or not they feel comfortable saying "Merry Christmas" to random strangers who don't respond in kind, whether a football player should stand or kneel during an anthem, and whether I should use the moniker "concentration camps" to describe the cruel treatment of children locked in cages at the border and fed frozen food (still frozen and uncooked) because the cultist's dear grandpa lived through a Nazi death camp and HIS suffering was real, whereas the suffering of the unrelated brown children is NOT.
I am horrified, not by symbolic insults to my philosophical identity, but by descriptions of real children and babies, forced into cramped, squalid, and harsh circumstance, where they have fallen ill, are not properly fed, are suffering the strain of separation from their parents, and missing any surrogate to take the place of a loving mother. Some of the children have died. The articles describe the trauma of a 2 year-old that has been carelessly thrust on a group of pre-teen girls who were told to care for him. He went days without food, he is ill, missing his diaper, snot from his runny nose covering his dirty shirt - with no mother to hold him. He clings to the little girls who have been randomly assigned his care.
On social media, I am constantly slammed for daring to sympathize with the children. "They broke the LAW!" is what many of the self righteous hotly proclaim, and "this started with OBAMA!" and "abortion is more important!" The justifications and obfuscations are jarring. Jesus weeps.
Numerous sexual assaults on the children have been reported. The cognitive dissonance of the pep rally freak show of Donald Trump in Florida, entertaining his red-hat base, who are keening "lock her up!" in an ecstasy of hate, at the same time that thousands of children are being willfully traumatized at the border is really more than I can bear.
While I am constitutionally incapable of behaving like an ostrich and hiding my head in the proverbial sand, in order to keep from hearing the moans and cries of the real, actual children who are suffering at our hands, I have to take a break now and then and touch base with my source, the ground of all being, my creator. In the midst of the caterwauling chaos, I take refuge in silence.
To truly live in silence, the inner voice must be stilled. Thank God for the meditation instructions, the inspiration of the holy ones, the examples of the saints and sages. To save my sanity, I need to spend some time every day floating in silence. To stop putting out words and thoughts and concepts into the ether, and to wait, instead, for the breath of God, is crucial to the sustenance of the inner life.
Human society is full of horrors. I suppose it always has been. We often make a big deal out of simple kindness, since it is simply rare, in light of the whole picture of human activity. "Fireman saves puppy by risking his own life," the article says, while countless others detail dozens of stories in which not so nice people are doing not so nice things to scores of other humans. There is a cacophony of misery.
Some eras are worse than others. There seems to be an ebb and flow to it. Often, it feels manipulated and deliberate, guided by the hands of a small group of people who have a lot to gain, financially, if they steer the story in a way that tugs at the heart strings or pumps up the volume on the self-righteous rhetoric that gets some people swelling their chests and jumping into causes they do not fully understand.
Today, Trump is flirting with starting a war with Iran after our very expensive, big drone was shot out of the sky. Concurrently, certain right wing extremists are publishing online "news" proclaiming the start of civil war if Trump isn't re-elected in 2020. In the halls of government in Washington, D.C., obstructionist Trumpist Republicans are desperately trying to drive the hearings away from the corruption and criminal activities of this administration which has indicted 34 of the president's associates (some of whom are in prison), and back onto Hillary Clinton's e-mails, a topic that floats, untethered to any relevant train of thought and definitely has no causal relationship to the challenges at the border, Trump's high crimes and misdemeanors, Trump's willingness to let Russians interfere with our elections (again), or the impending conflict with Iran.
It is all so tawdry and disgusting and petty.
In my little personal world, I find that taking care of an aging and ill body takes up a remarkable amount of time. Housekeeping is interminable. Hauling the detritus from one spot to another more organized spot, washing dishes, washing clothes, watering plants, "walking" the service dog (with my scooter) - on and on. Whilst my day-to-day activities have me dragging my body and possessions back and forth across the land, making little progress in anything useful, other than survival, in my meditations I can soar.
I woke very early this morning and drank at the spring of quietude for some time. I will go back many times today. At the beginning of each interlude of stillness, I bring all this chaos and lay it at the feet of the Lord, with all the earnestness that my heart can carry. I unburden myself and ask Him for his assistance. Please, Lord, I understand your commitment to free will and all that, but could you step in before things get out of hand?
Confident that God's got this, I dive in.
Peace be with you.
Silver Rose
No comments:
Post a Comment