NEW DIRECTIONS

 

I have enjoyed writing my diary entries and publishing them here, but just like yesterdays newspaper that today is used to wrap the table scraps for disposal, this blog has grown stale. I have less news to share, as the days wear on, because I am doing nothing but meditating and praying, creating art works, and doing some housework on the side.

The book I began years ago has ALSO begun to accumulate some dust, and I am beginning to wonder if I have enough interest in it to finish it - but, more important, whether or not there is anything of sufficient value to put out into society.

Most pertinent, however, is the fact that I have lost most of my vision in my left eye. It is as if I am trying to gaze through a puddle of water. This makes it very difficult to see my work here. I am still able to type without looking at the keyboard, but peering at the computer screen has become a headache.

The time has come to order my life toward accommodating the loss of vision. Thanks be to God, I don't need my eyes to meditate or pray - but everything else has become more complicated.

It is possible I will start an entirely NEW blog with another focus. But I need to rest for a while first.

In the meantime, feel free to wander over to my Facebook page and we can chat there. If you have any meditation questions, I will be available for recommendations.

God bless us all.

Silver

Sannyasini Kaliprana

SAINT TANCA AND NATIONAL HANDBAG DAY

 

Today is one of those days on the calendar when the female saints are once again given short shrift. There is only one female saint among the handful of other saints and, as per usual, it is a young girl who died "protecting her virginity" and for whom that is all that is known except her name which, in this case, is Tanca. In fact, she is so obscure, I could not find a single painting pretending to represent her. So, the picture at the top of today's entry is of a really cute handbag, in celebration of National Handbag Day!

I would like to be able to say something wise or pithy about just why it is that there are so few women saints and why so many of the ones we DO know about died defending themselves from the importunities of men. I, myself, wish to know why - out of all the things that might be said about a person -THIS fact is what someone chose to remember about so many of these practically unknown saints.

Suddenly, I am reminded of how many times in my life men have taken credit for my creative process and my work. For instance:

When I was living in one of the Vedanta houses in Hollywood, just prior to joining the convent, I was put in charge of "All Gurus Day" which was sometimes known as "Fathers Day" and I did a huge amount of work, especially with my creation of a multi-media show. In addition to organizing and scripting the program, I created, completely from scratch, a beautiful slide show about the underlying influence of "The Unknown Saints among us," complete with a music score underneath it, which I linked to particular slides with the help of a machine that a borrowed from one of the Vedanta men who happened to have access to this equipment.

I wrote the script for this creation, engaged an actor, directed her voiceover performance, created the program for the other aspects of the event, and even created and printed the flyers advertising it. The theme for the show itself had been my creation. Indeed, the entire thing was my "baby."

It was a gorgeous show, very meaningful, with a peaceful vibe. It had been a huge amount of work over several weeks and I was happy with the result.

After the show was over, I was standing outside the temple next to the man from whom I had borrowed the equipment. As the audience came out of the temple, they automatically looked to HIM and congratulated HIM on the beautiful program! It was bad enough that these people gave this ancillary guy the credit, even though these people had SEEN me do the work, had all kinds of conversations with me about it, and to whom it should have been more than obvious who had created it. What really astonished me is that he took the credit, as if he HAD actually created it even though he did nothing! Incredible. I was so astonished, I just looked at him, wide-eyed, with my mouth agape, as one after another, people came out of the temple, turned to him, and praised him for the wonderful slide show. To this day, I am sure this guy, who did nothing but lend me some equipment, would tell you that he did it all.

Later, I created a Vedanta magazine that another man took from me, brought to a bunch of other men and it is being published to this day. Stealing the brainchild of a woman is nothing to them. It happens all the time.

This tendency of men to assume unto themselves all the credit for the work produced by, created by and inspired in the minds of women is infuriating. Humans have been civilized for thousands of years, yet the male of our species continues to act like the head of the chimpanzee troupe. Because men are typically physically stronger and bigger than the women, (and I suppose because of all the damn testosterone), they forcibly take all the prizes, earned or not, and then distribute the crumbs of the remainders to the women they automatically assume it is their right to dominate. It is one thing to be proud of one's own work, but to abrogate to oneself the creation of others is the height of arrogance - and this is more common than dirt.

If a woman dares to complain about any of this, she is fiercely admonished, her worth as a person attacked - and there are all sorts of derogatory names heaped on  her head. Men employ these mechanisms of shame to keep us in line because women WILL often hesitate to challenge the man when he takes the credit for her work. We are often more retiring and we hesitate to demand recognition. And we don't want to abase ourselves by whining about it. What was I going to say to those people who came out of the temple and thanked that guy for all the work I did? "Hey, congratulate me! I'm the one that did it!" How would THAT have sounded? Would I have had to have a fight outside the shrine of the Lord? No. It wasn't my temperament.

Coincidentally, in monastic life, I've noticed a decided propensity to lauding character traits that are more typical of traits that men possess over those of women. For instance, in the Hindu tradition, the giving up of jewelries and cosmetics is part of the process of taking sannyas - but since when are these things customary for a man to use in any case? The cutting off of all hair is another one of these rather convenient "sacrifices." Most men wear their hair short, and women tend to let theirs grow. A large percentage of men go bald as they age, something over which they have NO control. How convenient of them to attribute spiritual currency to the shaving of their heads! It costs a man next to nothing to shave his head, but in many societies it is considered a great humiliation (and is often meted out as a punishment) to cut the hair of a woman.

Likewise, women are usually more interested in the "nesting" aspects of life than men. Many of us are clever about equipping and decorating our homes. A great number of us have a bit of the Mary Poppins about us and carry a virtual drug store in our handbags, from which we dispense hand lotion, tissues, aspirins, combs, and a vast array of useful items for our families. 

So, when I notice that there are TONS more male saints than female saints, my experience with the male of the species tells me that THIS is not all there is to the story. I am quite sure that there are just as many female saints as there are male saints (maybe more), but the men push the women back into the corners and push themselves and their companions forward to take the praise and the prizes, which makes me far less interested in the male saints and also makes me suspicious of the wonderful characteristics attributed to them.

I could give several more examples of  how male traits are given all sorts of honorifics and feminine traits are disparaged, but I'm sure you don't need me to do that.

There are those who opine that monastic life isn't appropriate for women and there have even been some writers in the Eastern traditions who say that women who DO take up monastic life are really men after all. It's silly, I know, but I didn't create this situation. I mention this obscure text as another example of how it is assumed that being a man is so much better than being a woman. It is hogwash, of course.

I have to categorically state that I am not saying that all women are the same or that all men are the same or that the character traits I have attributed to some men or women apply to ALL men or women. I am not saying that. I would never say that sort of thing about any topic because there are ALWAYS exceptions that prove the rule in any topic concerning groups of people - in the same way I would never say that all Republicans feel, think, act and speak a certain way - or Democrats. Variety is not dead and we are not manufactured beings. I am just noting tendencies that occur in the vast number of cases - not all cases.

I'd love to say that I have a solution for all the societal ills to which I have alluded with regard to men taking all the credit and for pushing women down and so forth, but I don't. I have no idea what to do (if anything) about this situation. I'm just observing and reporting it.

But I do wish to say one thing. I would like to encourage women to avoid taking all the prejudicial treatment "on board." To whatever extent we are maligned and discounted, we owe it to ourselves to keep our hearts pure and unsullied by the negative traits assigned to us by the opposite sex. 

Hindu Holy Woman

In fact, this persistent degradation of women is so pervasive that women themselves will often malign others of their sex and perpetuate the negative stereotypes. I see this in the obsessional support Donald Trump has with a certain type of woman. They even look the same. Bleached blonde hair, false eyelashes, tight clothing, high heels, lots of makeup. I am not a psychiatrist, but I am sure a psychiatrist might have something to say about women who gush over a man who treats women like dirt, calls them vulgar names, and is especially hard on women who don't pump up the volume on their sex appeal.

So, I am winding back to "the unknown saints among us." I would like to send a message out to all my sisters in spirit. Please don't take it to heart. Don't buy into what the misogynists are saying about you. Remember that there are misogynists in BOTH camps and keep your own counsel. Don't pick yourself apart with self-loathing and bemoan how little like a man you are. True, we don't have a lot of role models to pattern ourselves after, but once you've done the best you can, take confidence in the fact that the Lord sees everything you do, say and think. He knows you in your innermost being and is acquainted with your best self. Hold onto that and ignore the constant slurs of an uneven, unfair and illogical society.

May we all be blessed.

Silver Rose

P.S. I was struggling before the pandemic hit. Now groceries are even more expensive than they were before, the dog needs to go to the vet for his yearly shots, my car has had no maintenance for several years, and the electric bill for a very hot summer was $200.00 EACH month! Please consider contributing to my Amazon donation list. They have my address and can mail to me directly.

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SAINT AUREA OF PARIS FEAST DAY - OCTOBER 4 - NOTES ON CONTEMPLATIVE MONASTIC LIFE

 

Relic of the saint in a decorative housing

Saint Aurea of Paris celebrates her feast day today, along with Saint Frances of Assisi and at least half a dozen other saints, all male, as far as I can tell. As you know, I am keen to make the female saints a bit better known than they are presently. Of course, there is only so much one can say about a saint for whom not much information has been passed down to us over time - not because they are any less saintly than other saints, no doubt, but because women just don't get much recognition in a church run entirely by men.

I used to make a joke out of this, saying that women are more naturally saintly, so that when a man lives a saintly life, that fact alone is a miracle! While humorous, I won't claim that it is true. I am just casting around for some reason besides the obvious - that women are not celebrated nearly as much as the men...for whatever reason.

Why does this matter? Everyone needs a source of inspiration, and I find nothing more inspiring than another woman living the Christian ideals most assiduously - especially monastic women, and CONTEMPLATIVES, since that is my path.

Saint Aurea of Paris

Of particular interest with regard to today's saint is that she died of the plague. Considering that we are currently beset with a modern day epidemic, we can certainly relate to what she must have been feeling, especially since 160 of her monastic sisters also died of it.

Saint Aurea was originally Syrian but relocated to Paris, France and was put in charge of St. Martial convent as Abbes by Saint Elegius in 633, where she ruled for 33 years (a number I find interesting because when our Lord died, HE was 33, I believe.)

Saint Elegius

(Sometimes called "Eloi")

I find Saint Elegius himself to be a most interesting person, having been a metalsmith, and this is an area that interests me. I am currently contemplating learning how to make punched tin frames for my religious paintings and am trying to calculate whether all the time and money will be worth doing it, since I have already lost the vision in my left eye and doctors anticipate that I will likely lose it in my right as well.

Saint Elegius was extremely gifted in many areas and is the patron saint of metalsmiths, craftspeople, horses, and is credited as a gifted spiritual teacher. Saint Godeberta was one of his pupils.

Interior of Saint Paul Saint Louis Church in Paris, France
Photo by David Iliff

License: CC BY-SA 3.0

The Saint Martial convent where Saint Aurea of Paris was Abess is no more. I offer you the following etching from 1850 which depicts a narrow impasse called the "Impasse Saint-Martial" which was all that remained of the Saint-Martial convent by 1850.

artist: 

Theodor Joseph Hubert Hoffbauer

(1839-1922)

It does make me a little sad to see how this convent that held such holy women, saints and martyrs to the faith, has just disappeared - eaten up, as it were, by the city of Paris. Over time, these holy institutions could not be maintained. In addition to the terrible EXPENSE, there is no longer the enthusiasm for it. The faithful don't feel inspired to support the monastic institutions as they once did because they no longer understand the absolute value of the spiritual work of men and women who have set themselves aside for the sole purpose of contemplation of the Divine and prayers for the faithful. Intercessory prayer isn't valued in the same way it once was.

In addition, from the other side of things, the monastics have been sullied by the corruption of a small number of priests who were predators of children, who snuck into the ranks of the holy ones, causing untold damage to innocents. The monolithic institution of "the church," in turn, did not deal with these predators in an appropriate way, which highlighted some degradation that had occurred in the church, over time.

You see, monastic life in the Christian tradition actually started out being mostly composed of independent hermit-type Christians who set themselves apart from society, initially going out into the dessert to live a penitential, solitary existence dedicated to prayer and ascetic practices. Later, hermits are found housing themselves in caves, such as in the fairy chimneys of Cappadocia, in present-day Turkey. In some countries, they retreated to the forest. 

Hot air balloons float over the caves of

former religious hermits

in the "fairy chimneys" of Cappadocia, Turkey

At times, a particularly holy person would attract followers who would cluster around them in their own hermitages. Various types of organization were employed. Things grew from there, and I suspect that at least a partial return to the earlier manifestation of independent monastics is more than due. The corruptions of monolithic institutions need to be addressed, at least in the West.

In the Catholic Church, the home of the Christian mystics and saints, there are STILL official "diocesan hermits" provided for in the canon, but it appears that the institution is loathe to confer that designation. As in other traditions, if you are willing to give a small fortune to The Church, it will quickly dispense with any impediment that it imagines for anyone else  who might approach it. Even so, as a Diocesan Hermit, you are not all that "independent" because every detail about your life has to be approved by the bishop. You can't blame them for wanting to be in control of anyone pretending to be a part of the official institution, though. Mentally unstable people are often attracted to extreme forms of religious expression, and it takes a lot of work to establish whether or not an individual is of sound mind. 

Hindu sannyasini - holy woman

at the Kumba Mehla celebration

There are many independent holy men and women who have taken sannyas in India. A great number belong to large institutions. Some merely belong to the tradition. My sannyas was an independent thing approved by my swami, who had hoped that I would open a Vedanta Center in Arizona, but which turned out to be more physically taxing than I would be able to endure. Plus, I would be living in what was, essentially, a very small but very public space that I would have to share with a male swami who would visit once every 4 to 6 weeks. The master bedroom was to be reserved for the visiting swami, and this reminder that I was to do all the work while the man got all the benefits was something I did not wish to revisit in my life.

It isn't that I don't like people, by the way. I like people too much, and it would have pulled my focus dangerously off-kilter. The swami knew this, however, and I don't think he was surprised when I ultimately declined his offer to open the center in Arizona. When I had left the Hollywood convent, he said to me, "who will smile at the devotees if you leave?" He knew my nature.

Hindu holy woman - Sannyasini (renunciate)

In American culture, the general lack of value placed on the contemplative path is unfortunate. Just the presence of a person who has dedicated themselves to this way of life has a positive effect on everyone who comes in contact with him or her. But I remember hearing from many of the devotees who frequented the Vedanta temple that there was a good deal of resentment against the monks and nuns because it appeared as if they lived a higher standard than the devotees. The devotees didn't have to live in close quarters under constant criticism and, while the housing appeared to be grand, it is well known in monastic circles that we could use all sorts of things but couldn't actually have anything. Bottom line? The grass is greener, as they say. (Personally, I was thrilled at the freedom that this granted me. It was a delight to only have 2 or 3 keys on my key ring and not to have to pay a single bill.)

Many people in my generation became enamored of the mystical, contemplative life of the Hindus that was made popular in the hippie era. What many of us did not know is that the Christian church has its OWN mystics that are just marvelous. There is nothing in the Christian Church that cannot be perceived through the meditative methods of Vedanta. God is ONE.

[NOTE: While I am  happy to look at Catholicism through the lens of Vedanta, some Hindus whose tradition I am co-opting by this are, at times, peeved by it. Out of respect for that point of view, I offer THIS LINK TO A "HINDUISM TODAY" ARTICLE about this topic. It appears to be mostly a problem for those in India who object to the perceived efforts on the part of the Catholic Church to convert Hindus to the faith by using their own images and traditions "against" them.]

Sign outside Bede Griffiths' Shantivanam Ashram

in India

Unfortunately, parish life in America, on the other hand, is rule-bound with little support for the contemplative perspective. Pedestrian matters of sex, family life, contraception and abortion grab most of the attention, unlike in the early days of the church. I pray that one day they strike a better balance.

It had been my intention, in the early days of my hermitage, that I would start a small Catholic ashram catering to like-minded people, but I was robbed of a promised inheritance that would have purchased the house, and my physical disabilities worsened and multiplied. It isn't out of the question for the future, but at 66 years old, I am fast running out of future. I DO hope that my writings encourage others to explore this life, however.

Like the Church of Saint Martial, which housed so many women and so much prayer then disappeared into nothingness, I am of a certain age when I contemplate my own demise and anticipate that I will likewise disappear without much fanfare. The prayer corner where I spend my hours speaking with the Lord will be partitioned and distributed among the faithful, a statue here, an icon there, a rosary somewhere else. None of these things are permanent. What IS permanent are my prayers and the vibrations of my conversations with and meditations on the Lord.

What I hope to leave behind is an appetite for the contemplative life, and it is my hope that other women will be inspired to live the vowed life at home, like their friend, the accidental hermit.

May we all be blessed!

Silver Rose

Sannyasini Kaliprana

P.S. Food has gotten more expensive during the Covid virus, on top of a food budget that was ALREADY very tight here. I've long ago reverted to a vegetarian diet, but would welcome some canned fish, if wild caught (mercury free.) There are other necessary items listed on my donation list on Amazon. They have my address and will mail to me direct. Check it out on my donation list, link below:

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